Skinny Girls Cry


This one's for all my sisters.

The one who are skinny and also the ones who are not.

To remind you that no weight or size exempts you from being human.


This is a post I have wanted to write for so long, yet found in my own heart a fear of being judged or misunderstood.

I'm afraid of being judged for being skinny.

I'm afraid I'll be misunderstood and stereotyped - that you'll think I have it all, or have it easier, or must be happy all the time.


No, I am not ignorant to the privilege that I have as a tall, thin, white woman.

I also am not ignorant to the stereotype of skinny girls.

And how girls deprive themselves in desperation to be skinny.

Thinking that a skinny Body would afford them the love, worth and belonging they so deeply desire.


I was that girl.

I lost weight and I lost my Self in the narrow ideals of our society in respect to beauty and health.

As I picked myself up, piece by piece, from a shattered dream that skinny would afford me everything I desired - I learned that being skinny doesn't exempt you from being human.


Skinny girls cry, too.


They don't have it all together.

They get mad and sad.

They grieve.

They get dumped.

They're insecure.

They have mountains of fear.


We all do.

Because we're all more than the the label, the word, "skinny" or "fat".

We're all human.


Today, although I am over 30 pounds heavier than I was in my fierce drive to be skinny - I am still skinny.

I see that clearly now.

I am naturally skinny.

It's the way I was made.


And I cannot say that I haven't had my moments when I've wanted just the opposite, too.

I have purposefully tried to gain weight and moved my Body less in order to be more like the "real woman {who} have curves".


Because, although I am skinny, I am also a Whole Woman.

So I was confused about what people would think when they saw my natural shape.

Would they see ME?

Or just my Body?

Would they assume I have it all and have never suffered from Body shame and insecurity?


You can see it in my story - the cycle of dissatisfaction, dis-ease and fear can seem to be never-ending.

It can be ended, however. And it must be.

The way that we stop this seemingly never-ending cycle of compare and despair is to finally accept and celebrate that in our common bond of humanity we are all made divinely, with purpose, and - yes - differently.

And, thus, beauty and fitness and health will look different for each and every one of us.


In my decade long journey to feel at home in my skin, I have come to this conclusion:

It doesn't really matter what shape you are.

Whatever is your natural shape - it's perfect.

Because you were divinely made.


We all were.


Hear this now: there is nothing wrong or broken about your size - be it a two or a twenty two.

It's all purposeful.


And so I am here to dispel any fantasy that society has sold to you which says that being skinny will solve your insecurity, shame and fear. Or that being curvy will solve your insecurity, shame and fear, for that matter.


The confidence, the comfort, the love, the worth and the belonging that you so desire - that's an inside job, not an outside job.


Let me make it perfectly clear:

Your Body is not here as an object to obtain worth, love and belonging.

Your Body is here as a vessel for your Soul - which is in fact the source of infinite worth, love and belonging.


It's your inside job to dive deep within and find that worth, love and belonging within yourself and then share it with the world outside of you.


Because that is what your Body was made for. 

Not to earn worth love and belonging, but to be an expression of it.


So it's time to befriend your fear and take great care of your emotions.

To love your Whole Self like never before.

In every emotion. In every size. In every wrinkle. In every way.

Because skinny girls cry, too.


You just simply can't avoid your humanity.

It's what you came here for (and that's a whole other post in itself).


And so I empower you sisters, all of you, to do the inside work.

Learn to love your natural, true Self unconditionally.

Not despite your Body weight and size - but because of it.


Big love,



P.S. If you feel called to start your internal work and tap into your internal wisdom and inherent power so that you can finally embody your natural state of health, join me for the June 3-Day Activate Your Health Challenge.